Monday, February 12, 2024

Salvation Through Surrender: Chapter 3 – Answers in Expected Places

Chapter 3 – Answers in Expected Places

The deepest depth of the library is mist and lit up by torches with blue cold flames on them. It’s strangely quiet and vacant down here. I’m pretty sure others were given the privilege to come down here since I wasn’t the only one who helped the librarians. Looking through the books, I find a mix of the books I've already read plus some other ones on the nature of truth, metaphysics, political conflicts, theories on magic, and some other random books. I wonder why this stuff is all disorganized compared to the neatly organized library above.

“That’s because all of these books are tailored towards you,” I hear a voice in the mist say.

A librarian who looks different than the others appears out of the mist. This one only has tentacles for his right arm and legs while his face and left hand is skeletal. Speaking of his face, it’s split open down the center with a singular large yellow eye in the center of it. The eye with a triangle for an iris on his left hand faintly glows.

“My appearance is due to all the knowledge I have obtained, which is far beyond that of even the librarians on the upper floors. My name is Najib.  As to the exact reason why God chooses to put me in this form is beyond my understanding,” the man continues to say.

Ah, of course, he can read my mind. I should’ve expected it.

“We can have this conversation entirely like this if you wish.” Or perhaps would you like it to be in your mind? I already know your thoughts such as the one about Ishank wanting to talk and get together with the rest of the librarians. Silly old fool should already know that the librarians know what the others are thinking.

“No, talking normally is fine. It feels rude to have you use your magic so we can talk.”

“Not at all, Jigna. I’ve heard what you’ve done and I thank you for helping to bring peace to this library. This place is empty to your eyes because you’ve been transported to a small pocket dimension where we can speak and show you the books that pertain to your interests in private. The others who came down here are in their own dimensions while those who come down here without permission are instantly transported back upstairs once their foot touches the floor.”

“Teleportation magic. I’ve heard the most skilled mages were able to use it, but I never found a book on how to use it.”

“That’s because the information is kept in the most secure places of the most fortified libraries in the kingdom. In addition, you’ll have to prove to the Church that you’re trustworthy enough to use it. I can see with this book selection that there are copies of the books in this library that you have an interest in learning about magic. It’s also very scattered, which is why it appears to be so disorganized.”

“I am unsure of where to take my life. That’s why I’m here.”

“Then let me see how I can help. There should be a common theme between all these books. Let’s see here. There are books on discernment of being in a relationship or consecrated to God and it looks like you’re leaning more towards being married. In terms of magic, there’s no specified field either than wanting to learn the nature of it, which is good.”

“Why’s that?”

“The power-hungry want to use magic for anything other than its God-given purpose. That is why they can’t always wield it properly, can’t use it at all, or aren’t able to use it in the way they wish. Those poor souls typically resort to selling their souls and using satanic spells in the end if their desires to use magic aren’t corrected. Anyway, back to you. Ah! Books on the current day and past mysteries are here too. They’re a personal favorite of mine as well.”

“Do you have any recommendations?”

“It looks like you’re reading most of my favorites. There are some that I haven’t gotten to yet such as a book on the Ignited, grace-starved, Hands of God, and…Lusty Lizardwomen?”

“Huh?”

“Let’s see here…beastmen, takes men, women, and children away by night, seductive, use magic through their voice…Men have such strange tastes.”

“What’s that book doing there?”

“It’s another mystery book and it’s about a particular kind of beastman. It must be a new book that got added to the library judging from me never seeing it and the publication date being this year.”

“So, what do you think?”

“I think there’s a definite direction you’re heading in, but if you want to narrow it further, I can show you to the most important room in this library which is the source of all the truth in it.”

“Yes, please show me to it.”

“Very well.”

Without even moving, the room shifts around us until Najib and I are standing outside a room. The door to the room opens by itself and inside of it is an adoration chapel.

“Of course it would be,” I say to myself.

“Of course. I sense some small bits of disappointment from you.”

“I’m fine.”

“Let God speak to you in the silence and you’ll know for sure what path to take in your life. I’ll leave you alone for the time being.”

I kneel in front of the monstrance, and say, “Lord, you’ve brought me out here for a reason to help me discover my role in Your plan. I am as ignorant now as I was before and know that no matter how much I learn, I will never know everything and forget the truth, especially when I sin. Fill my mind will Your presence and reveal to me the secrets of Your heart. As in all things, I surrender my will and pride to You. Make me humble. Make me wise. Make me Your faithful servant. Make me Yours.”

As I silently pray, I push out intrusive thoughts so that my mind is completely clear. After an unknown amount of minutes or maybe hours pass, I feel a revelation come to my mind as if I just realized something. I begin to hear the soft music that comprises reality and what makes all of reality work in tandem with one another. In my mind’s eye, reality tears apart until it is all nothing but words describing the truth of each object. It’s an almost maddening experience because of how much singing is going on along with the disruptions in it that are caused by fallen men and demons, however, the disruptions are ironed over by the heavenly singing and somehow enhanced by doing so. Everything continues to unravel until finally a singular truth is revealed to me between the lines of every truth that exists.

“I love you,” I hear in a voice that sounds almost familiar to me.

It’s a voice that I heard in my family, friends, and friendly strangers. These same two words are repeated over and over again in every good action and exist in every truth. Reality puts itself back together as I continue to hear “I love you” over and over again until I wake up and see that I’m still in the adoration chapel. I can hear a final “I love you” come from the monstrance before everything goes quiet. Najib opens the door and doesn’t say anything to me at first as he looks at me. He then conjures a mirror made of ice. In the reflection of the mirror. I see that all the eyes in my head have come together in the cross-shaped cut in my forehead to form a singular golden eye with a triangular iris.

“Congratulations on reaching enlightenment. I trust that you now know what you want to do,” Najib says.

“I do,” I say.

I go to the university back home and apply for the role of a librarian with the approval of the librarians I’ve met such as Najib and his fellow coworkers who gave me a glowing recommendation. Because of them and the fact that I helped protect a library, I am immediately accepted and stationed at a library close to home. My family is proud of what I’ve accomplished, throws a party for me, and promises to visit the library when they can. Thank you, God, for helping me to get where I belong. Now, I can contemplate You through knowledge and truth for the rest of my life.

While working one day, a visitor catches my attention. He’s a man from Canis. The man is dressed in heavy coats and armor and is warmed further through a flame spell. His skin is tan, his eyes are orange and yellow, and he’s middle-aged judging from his face. As he looks through the books, I fly over from one of the higher floors to him. My flying gets his attention and I seem to amaze him.

“Do you need any help?” I ask.

“No. No, ma’am,” he says.

“What’s a man like you from Canis doing here?”

“I was ‘honorably’ kicked out from my kingdom because I wasn’t worthy of any role in the army or as a blacksmith, so I came here because I heard it was a land of knowledge and truth.”

I smile and he smiles in return. In this man, I see my next learning experience, one that I’ve been preparing for and hinted at through my studying.

“I’ve done my own search for God’s role in my life so I can help you find yours. My name is Jigna. What’s yours?”

“Kevalin.”

“That’s a name that means seeker of the absolute. It’s a wonderful and fitting name for you.”

“Thank you.”

“Now, let’s journey through truth and knowledge to find your purpose together.”


The End

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