Chapter
3 – Victory Handed to You
I wake up in my bed and look for my
rosary to say my morning prayers, but can’t find it. I go downstairs to see my
parents, brothers, and sisters eating breakfast and ask them if they have it
and if we’re going to say our morning prayers together.
“Don’t worry about those, Uriel.
Quickly eat your breakfast so we can go out to the zoo,” my father says.
Confused, I say, “I’m fine. What’s
going on?”
My mother hugs, kisses me on the
cheek and says, “Come on, Uriel. We can head out before everyone else to get
some mother-son bonding time in.”
I resist my mother’s pull and let
go of her grip on my hands.
“Something is wrong here,” I say
aloud.
When I blink, I see that I’m in the
middle of a city with tall white towers, golden statues of people, and people
wearing gold robes flying everywhere. Is this Lux Mane?
“You couldn’t be kept in the dream
for a little longer, could you?” I hear a voice say. It sounds like it’s coming
from over my shoulder, but there’s no one there. “You kept praying Hail Marys
while you were unconscious, a bad habit of yours, and a waste of breath as you
can see now that you’re in our domain.”
“If I could break your spell with
simple prayers like those while I’m here, then resisting your temptations will
be a simple matter,” I say.
“Ah, you say that, but look where
you are, the heart of who you consider your enemy’s den. You are like a fly in
a spider’s web.”
My vision blurs and I see that I’m
retreating from a burning city that’s being besieged by the ships from
Aushalten.
“Remember when you abandoned your
people, your family, to the army of Aushalten to be slaughtered?”
“Why remind me of this?” I ask. “I
didn’t commit any sin. Even if I did take part in the talks or tried to
negotiate with them, then nothing would change. I’m not a negotiator or a
convincing person. I’m a perpetual penitent, so all I can do is suffer and pray
for them.”
I feel someone hit me across the
head. My head bleeds and feels even lighter than before.
“Who hit you?” the voice asks, now
even more penetrating in my mind. “You choose to rebel against the Lux Mane who
has brought an everlasting peace to a world that’s eternal at odds with one
another. There are always wars like this being fought on big and small scales
on your planet over beliefs and what people love, even if what they believe is
wrong and they love what destroys them.”
“If that is what God wills of us,
then let it be so.”
“But you didn’t want this to
happen. Your prayers went unanswered.”
“God heard them, but who am I to
ask God for anything? He heard, didn’t do as I asked, and that’s that. What I
want to happen isn’t always what should happen.”
What feels like a knife digs into
my head as my vision blurs and a light blinds me. My vision settles, and I see
people in moments of passion that I cover my eyes from.
“What’s so wrong with pleasures of
the flesh? Why not give yourself to making another person feel happy?”
“It objectifies them for a moment’s
pleasure and disgraces an act that’s supposed to be confined to holy matrimony
and the purpose of creating children,” I say. “What makes a person feel good
does not always mean it’s good. For example, I feel freer when I resist sin
rather than let myself be ruled by the wants of my weak body and mind, which
are always changing.”
Again, I feel hit across the head,
and my skull cracks. My head feels like it’s being squeezed by knife-like
fingers.
“Your halo must be on too tight,”
the voice jokes, which digs even deeper into my mind. Everything changes again
to a calming farm town that I used to stay in and frequent for food and water
as a penitent. “These humble people fight and suffer under our spell, even as
we give them comfort, happiness, and perpetual sunlight for their crops. Still,
they fall to us. Should we allow them to die or punish them for their actions?”
“Punish me first if you’re going to
do that. You know that I sin from time to sin, and give in to my weakness.”
“What of the people who are feeding
and sheltering the homeless while also believing as we do? Are they hypocrites
and deserving of punishment?”
“Who are you? Judas? Even virtuous
acts can be tainted by ill-intention no matter how good their results may be.”
Yet again, I feel a crack across my
head. Now, I can hardly stand as blood pours from my head like a fountain.
Looking up, I see that I’m back in my original home with all my friends and
family in it, enjoying themselves and laughing.
The voice explains, “We of Lux Mane
were like you. Faithful to God and ever suffering and self-sacrificing. When
angels of light gave us comfort and spoke true words from scripture and sacred
teachings, we accepted their gifts. Just as we did, they descended on us,
gifting us with many things that improved living, ceased conflicts, helped the
poor, healed the dying, and brought the dead back to life. They also taught us
opposing teachings to our faith, but because they did so much good, we accepted
them and embraced their wisdom. If they managed to do so much good, why would
we want to go back to living a life of conflict and suffering?”
“They offered you a poisoned apple.
You gave in to weakness. That’s all that happened, and I pity you for it. May
God save your souls.”
Again, I’m hit in the head.
“If you want pain so much, then you
can have it. I’ll be here if you change your mind.”
An overwhelming light shines down
on me, and I feel an immense weight pin me to the ground. It’s then that I feel
like I’m put into a blender of glass, sharp invisible shards that cut every
part of my body, face, and limbs. I’m powerless to do anything but pray, so I
pray and offer up the pain. I offer up the pain for my sins, those of my loved
ones, those who are lost, those who don’t know better, those who have given in
to weakness, and especially, for those who refuse to know better, for my
enemies.
“Uriel! This is it. This is the
end!” I hear a voice say again.
My body feels even lighter than
usual, and I feel pulled away from the light and towards a comforting darkness.
I reach out to whatever is calling to me, feel something in my way, and pull it
out of the way. I see that I’m back in the underground hideout with Caiaphas,
praying with him.
“Good work, Uriel,” Caiaphas says.
I see that the fruit and water that
I went out to get are untouched and there are no marks on me. My left arm is
still restrained by a rosary behind my back, and my head isn’t bleeding.
“What happened?” I ask.
“You fought against their
temptation and won. I’m proud of you.”
Hearing a multitude of screams above
us, Caiaphas and I go outside to see a starry night sky with the planet of Lux
Mane’s light growing dull. The thousands of eyes and hands I saw in the sky
retreat into it, along with its light, and being outside doesn’t make me feel
like I’m being subjected to their wretched curse. Out of the darkness of space,
two massive arms appear with bleeding, pierced hands, grab the entire planet
with both hands, and disappear in the blink of an eye.
I kneel and say, “Glory be to God!
It’s finally over! Praise be to God!”
I then leap up, laugh, and dance
around like an idiot. Caiaphas even dances and laughs with me, jumping around
like an excited child, and being more joyous than I’ve ever seen him.
As we hug, he says, “Let’s go into
town to celebrate. I’m sure the townspeople will be back to their senses and
wanting to celebrate as well if they aren’t already.”
“What about the people who will
miss Lux Mane and are devastated by its loss? I’m sure there are people out
there who will be,” I say.
“We’ll make sure they’ll see the
error of their ways, but don’t let the thought of them sour the mood. Let’s
enjoy this victory that God has given us.”
Caiaphas and I walk to the nearby
town to celebrate, and I feel better than ever. Sure, this isn’t the end of my
story; much penance will still have to be done, and more challenges will come
to test me, but with my renewed confidence, I’m sure that I’ll be able to
overcome and make it through it all. With God, my loved ones in Heaven,
Caiaphas, and the many people who pray for me and with me, nothing will ever
truly defeat me.
The End
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